


Tony Experiences Christmas

by giraffeofpaper



Category: Arrested Development
Genre: Christmas Fluff, M/M, Tony's first time celebrating Christmas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 15:30:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1095648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giraffeofpaper/pseuds/giraffeofpaper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>GOB loves Christmas, for some inexplicable reason, but Tony's never celebrated it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tony Experiences Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [singingtomysoul](https://archiveofourown.org/users/singingtomysoul/gifts).



GOB has been flitting around their apartment like a small child who has eaten an entire cake. He’s been laughing gleefully, singing to himself, and extra affectionate with Tony. While GOB is normally a huggy, touchy kind of guy, he’s been even moreso than usual. Tony can’t complain about the back rubs, massages, and the spontaneous kisses, but he is curious about what is going on.  
  
As GOB smothers Tony in yet another crushing bear hug, Tony decides he needs to know what’s up. “GOB,” he asks, even though GOB’s face is almost uncomfortably close to his. “Why on earth have you been so happy lately?”  
  
“Why haven’t you been so happy?” GOB asks, moving no farther away from Tony.  
  
“I’ve been…normal. Nothing to complain about. But you, you have been like, really happy. What’s up?”  
  
“Oh, Tony,” GOB responds with a little laugh, and then steps back as he realizes Tony really doesn’t understand. “It’s Christmastime,” he then tells him seriously. “How on earth can you not be happy when it’s Christmas?’  
  
“You do realize I’m Jewish, right?”  
  
“Yeah,” GOB responds absently. “But aren’t you excited for the tree and the presents and the lights and Santa and the presents and the music and the Christmas?” His speech speeds up as he continues on, and he begins bouncing like a child until he is practically dancing in the living room.  
  
“I’ve never celebrated Christmas, Gob,” Tony says, seriously. “That’s not a Jewish thing. We have Hanukkah instead. And that’s cool, I guess, but I’m not really all that attached to it.”  
  
“Wait, Jews don’t celebrate Christmas? Doesn’t everyone celebrate Christmas? Isn’t it just a national  holiday like Halloween or Valentine’s Day?”  
  
“No, it’s to celebrate Jesus’ birthday, or something. I don’t know, us Jews don’t believe in that stuff.” Tony doesn’t really care about the Holiday season anyway. It’s just a time for weird family relations, more expensive restaurants, and glitter. Tony likes glitter, but thinks that the whole year should be for glitter, and it’s stupid that people try to allot it all to just one month of the year.  
  
“You don’t love Jesus? But… I was Jesus. You loved that, right?” GOB looks pleading, sad, desperate.  
  
Tony can see that GOB really wants to celebrate Christmas, and as he looks at him with his eyes full of childlike joy, he can feel his resolve caving. “Yes, you made an awesome, pretty ripped, Jesus.” GOB smiles proudly. “And, if you really want to celebrate Christmas, you can show me what it’s like and we can celebrate together. Deal?”  
  
Suddenly GOB’s arms are wrapped back around him, and he is hugging him tightly, and kissing Tony all over his face. “Yes!” he says gleefully, in-between kisses. “I knew you’d come around. Taste the happy, Tony. There’s just, so much happy!”  
  
Is GOB…crying? Tony supposes there is more than one way to taste the happy. He is certainly tasting the saltiness of GOB’s tears on his face, but he doesn’t mind. He likes kissing GOB, and he likes when he’s happy, so all is good in his little world.  
  
——  
  
GOB has been out of the apartment a lot lately. Tony’s caught him sneaking out at weird times in the evening, with no good excuses, and while GOB has peppered him with distraction kisses, Tony is still suspicious.  
  
One day, when GOB is almost half an hour late getting home from…whatever it is that he does… for the third night in a row, Tony confronts him. “GOB what on earth have you been doing?” he asks, narrowing his eyes suspiciously. “Don’t tell me you’ve been following people to their cars again. I’ve told you - we have enough money to make ends meet without you doing that. We’re fine.”  
  
The smile that is shining in GOB’s eyes would indicate that he is not, in fact, doing something he does not enjoy. “No Tony,” he says, leaning in to kiss him. “I’m just….it’s Christmas, okay? I’m excited! I’m just so excited that I forget to come home sometimes. That makes sense, right?”  
  
GOB is like a puppy-dog, eager to please, but Tony steps back slightly as GOB tries to cover him with kisses. “Seriously though, where have you been?”  
  
“It’s nothing. Really. Just a surprise. Something. You know. Just…Christmas. It’s just so exciting!”  
  
Tony sighs. “Okay,” he says, figuring there’s probably more to the story, but letting it go for now. “Just try to let me know when you’re going to be late, okay?”  
  
“But you’re late all the time! I look for you and it’s like, where’s Tony? Then I have to say ‘wonder’ to make you appear. Come on!”  
  
Tony purses his lips. Whenever he appears to be late, it’s normally because he’s hiding somewhere, waiting for someone to say the word, “wonder”. Tony is never late. In fact, Tony is always ridiculously early, as he has grown accustomed to casing out rooms and locations to find a good place to hide before anyone else can arrive and find him. “GOB, we’ve gone over this,” he says. “It’s just an illusion. You’re not actually making me appear by saying ‘wonder’.”  
  
“Well, I knew that…” GOB says, although he probably didn’t. He is still often in awe of Tony’s magic, although he’d never admit it, except when gushing over every illusion he ever did. GOB is pretty much Tony’s biggest fan. He sometimes still calls him his ‘rival magician’ but it has been months now since they first became boyfriends, and the only thing they are truly rivals at now is board games and wrestling. Tony doesn’t mind - GOB strokes his ego, among other things, and he keeps him happy, and that’s probably good enough.  
  
“Just be cool, okay? You know I love you babe, but you have to be reliable, okay?”  
  
“How could I be anything other than cool with someone as neat as you?”  
  
GOB is cheesy and it’s kind of gross, but Tony doesn’t really mind.  
  
——  
  
The next day GOB is home when expected, but he is whistling a tune that Tony can’t quite recognize. He kisses Tony in an almost domestic way, and tells him that it is the day when they shall get their tree. Tony knows all about Christmas trees - he’s seen them on the streets of town, lit up with bright lights, seen them shine through the windows of houses on his block, but never has he had a tree of his own. He’s never really seen the appeal - it’s just taking a tree from outside, covering it in lights, and sticking it in your living room where it probably brings in rats and squirrels and a whole myriad of bugs. There are a bunch of unnecessary things about Christmas trees, and although Tony is all for extravagance and flashiness, a Christmas tree just doesn’t interest him.  
  
“We can cover the tree with glitter and tinsel and there’s supposed to be a star or angel or something at the top but we can totally make it our faces because we’re angels… or stars…” GOB says enthusiastically, smiling at Tony with his crooked smile. “Please? It will be fun!”  
  
Tony just shakes his head and agrees to go to the tree-lot with him. GOB’s grin and hug makes it all worth it.  
  
After arriving at the tree lot, GOB immediately runs to the biggest tree he can find. “This one is perfect,” he tells Tony enthusiastically, but Tony shakes his head.  
  
“First of all,” he says, “If we are shopping for a tree, we are going to do this right and not just get the first tree we see. Second of all, that tree is way too big for my— Gobie what are you doing?” As Tony speaks, GOB has pulled a knife out of his pocket and is beginning to do an extravagant dance.  
  
“I’m going to cut the tree down, and it will be like an illusion,” GOB rasps with a glimmer in his eye.  
  
“Do you mean because it’s already chopped down and we just have to pick it up? I’m pretty sure that’s common knowledge,” Tony says, feeling a little embarrassed by his boyfriend’s behaviour. “Come on,” he tells him, pulling him along, and signalling for GOB to put the knife back in his pocket. “We’ll find a tree.”  
  
“Come on!”  GOB echoes like a child. “It was just a joke, stupid. Just a joke. Plus it’s Christmas.”  
  
The two wander around the lot for a while, until GOB finds a tree he likes. “What about this one?” he asks Tony, gesturing wildly towards it, and accidentally sending out a giant fire ball. Tony gasps in shock, and GOB stands frozen, and motionless, unable to move. To the surprise of both men, the tree does not actually catch fire, and the fire ball is extinguished on contact. They both stand there, puzzled, when a tired looking teenage salesman interrupts them.  
  
“Yeah, they do that,” he says, looking bored. “We sprayed some trees with something to stop them from being flammable because some people were worried about the fire hazard of wood inside their homes. Stupid really. Might cause cancer, but some people just need their trees to be safe or something.”  
  
“We’ll take it.” Tony no longer needs any convincing.  
  
The tree barely fits through the door, and it has to stand on an angle in the living room as the ceiling is too low for it to stand up properly, but GOB can’t stop gushing about it, and he’s clearly so happy, that Tony almost doesn’t mind. He only grumbles a little as he shoos the half-dead bird lying in the branches out the door, despite GOB’s pleas to keep it. Christmas makes GOB happy, so it can’t be that bad, plus it’s an excuse for more glitter, even if it is just one month a year.  
  
———  
  
GOB has been leaving again at odd times, holding only flimsy excuses, saying he’s doing stuff like, “going to see the family.” If that’s really where GOB is going, Tony doesn’t mind not being invited, as the Bluths frighten him, but he is suspicious that GOB is doing something else. Tony’s not that trusting a guy, but GOB’s not a particularly trustworthy guy either, so it’s not entirely unfounded. When GOB leaves under suspicious circumstances for the third time, this time carrying a large bulky bag, Tony decides to follow him, just to make sure his boyfriend isn’t getting into too much trouble.  
  
Tony doesn’t have any idea where GOB is going, but as he follows him in the car, slightly frustrated, he remembers something GOB had told him earlier. “It’s Christmas. People have secrets around Christmas, and it’s okay - they’re normally presents, or something awesome.” GOB had followed up the statement with a kiss, and that was something awesome in and of itself, so Tony had been more accepting. He can’t have been following GOB for more than 5 minutes before his conscious gets the best of him, and he decides to give GOB the benefit of the doubt, because it’s Christmas, as GOB always says. As GOB turns down a side-street, Tony keeps driving straight, and begins the drive back to their place.  
  
It’s a probably a good thing Tony turned around when he did, or he would have seen GOB pull into the driveway of a fairly sketchy looking house, which likely would not have helped in instilling any confidence whatsoever. But Tony returns home feeling warm, with some sort of fuzzy happy spirit inside him.  
  
——  
  
Tony walks into the kitchen one morning after GOB has already left for the day, and pauses as he notices a flyer on the counter. “Yachts R Us”, the flyer reads. Tony stares at it for a moment, and then realizing what the flyer could mean, shakes his head and grabs a black sharpies.  
  
“GOB, I do not need a yacht for Christmas,” he writes, in bold letters, underlying the ‘not’ several times. “They are expensive and I would never use it. Don’t do it.”  
  
When GOB gets home later in the day, he notices the writing on the catalogue.  
  
“What? A yacht? For you? You thought I was going to buy you a yacht?” he laughs in his typical way. “Never!” He pauses, and seems to consider for a moment. “Well… actually that would have been a good idea… maybe I should get you a yacht! I definitely wasn’t just buying a yacht for me…. You’d like a yacht, right?”  
  
“GOB. We do not need a yacht. No yacht.”  
  
“Well, of course, we don’t need a yacht, Tony. I know exactly what you want.” GOB smiles, and pats Tony knowingly on the shoulder, but Tony isn’t convinced.  
  
“You know I’m serious, right? We. Do. Not. Need. A. Yacht.”  
  
“Of course I know you’re serious.” GOB pulls Tony closer, and is practically whispering intimately in his ear.  
  
“GOB. I feel like you’re not taking me seriously. Seriously.”  
  
GOB probably wasn’t taking him seriously, especially since as he began to kiss down Tony’s neck Tony could swear he was whispering the word yacht, but sometimes there were things more important than arguing about expensive boats - things like normal sex. And that is a thing they can both agree on.  
  
—  
  
“Is there any particular sort of gift you’re supposed to give at Christmas?” Tony asks, as he and GOB eat breakfast the next morning.  
  
“Maybe something big and flashy and expensive. Like a yacht.”  
  
“GOB, I’m not buying you a yacht. And I’ve told you I don’t want one.”  
  
“I know you’re not, but what am I?”  
  
Tony realizes very quickly that this conversation will go nowhere if he chooses to take this route, so he tries from a different angle. He’s done some research via something searches, and even some watching of some made-for-TV Christmas movies, so he has a few ideas. “Can it be something sentimental or personal or something? It’s hard to know what to get you when I have no idea what you’re expecting.”  
  
“Just give something you think the other person will like, I guess. You know me. You know what I’d like. And I know what you’d like.”  
  
“Not a yacht.”  
  
GOB would probably like a pet, and Tony would love to help raise it with him. Maybe a kitten, or a dog, or a bird or something. Tony thinks that that would probably be a good idea. He also figures that in addition to whatever that is, he should get something big to unwrap, because the little knowledge he does have about Christmas includes the fact that greedy children hungrily and quickly unwrap presents. No one would describe GOB as anything but a child, despite his apparent age.  
  
“Yep,” GOB replies, proudly. “I definitely did not buy myself a yacht for Christmas.”  
  
Tony doesn’t even bother trying to respond to that.  
———  
  
Christmas is getting closer, and GOB seems to be buzzing with energy. He can’t sit still, he’s talking all the time, and he also seems to have an increased sex drive, which makes Tony significantly less apt to complain.  However, when Tony arrives home one day to a strange aroma, he becomes a little concerned.  
  
“Gobie… are you okay? It smells like something died in here! Or feet. Definitely feet. ”  
  
“I’m just making Christmas cookies,” GOB says happily, rushing out of the kitchen and planting a kiss on Tony’s mouth.  
  
“Please tell me you’re not mixing them with your feet.”  
  
“No, silly. Hold on - there are some cooling! I’ll go grab you one!” GOB rushes to the kitchen, and returns with a burnt crumbly object that smells like death and has a horrid yellow colour. Tony looks at it in horror.  
  
“What did you… what… what’s in…” Tony’s at a loss for words.  
  
“Well, there’s some egg, and water, and some mustard and parmesan chess,” GOB tells him, biting into his own cookie. “It’s good!” he exclaims with his mouth full, only cringing slightly. “But a little dry. I’ll add some more water to the next batch to fix that.”  
  
Tony knows a lot about cooking, as he grew up in a bakery, and while he’s never baked Christmas cookies, he assumes they’re not too different from the Hannukah cookies he helped his mother make every year as a child. Regardless, they would most certainly be better than this disaster GOB was currently trying cram into his mouth, while encouraging him to “Try it, try it, try it!”  
  
Tony pushes the cookie away, and GOB looks hurt, but there’s no way that he’s going to eat that. “Why don’t we go make cookies together, with my recipe,” he tells GOB, looking at him pointedly. “With no cheese. And no mustard. And with some actual sugar.” GOB looks hurt, and while Tony doesn’t want his boyfriend to be angry or sad, he also doesn’t want to endure the stomach turmoil that would result from tasting the crumbly yellow mountain of doom. “GOB please don’t tell me you actually think these cookies are good. Please.”  
  
“Well I like them.”  
  
It seems like GOB is going to walk away like a wounded puppy, but as Tony goes into the kitchen to make his own cookies, GOB follows him, and together they make a sweet sugar dough, and shape it into stars and trees and mittens. GOB isn’t good at mixing, but Tony tries to be patient as he shows him how and even though both end up covered in flour, it’s okay. The two men are having fun and even if the cookies aren’t perfectly shaped, even if they’re not like the ones Tony’s mother always made, they’ll still taste good, especially in comparison to GOB’s cookies. But in a way these are GOB’s cookies too - he made them with Tony, of course, but they are their cookies, and that’s what makes them so special.  
  
They do taste good. Tony especially likes the way they taste when he kisses GOB after he’s eaten one. They somehow taste sweeter on his lips.  
  
——  
Before Tony knows it, Christmas Eve has come. GOB is really excited about it.  
  
“What’s so exciting about Christmas Eve anyway,” Tony asks GOB as GOB seems to be shaking with an undeniable energy.  
  
“It’s exciting because it’s Christmas, Tony. It’s Christmas.”  
  
“…Okay. So what are we supposed to do? Do we do something with Jesus or something?”  
  
GOB pauses. “Yeah, we never did that stuff,” he responds, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s just, Christmas. It’s pretty neat. And family, or something.”  
  
Tony doesn’t really understand, but he isn’t going to try. “Oh yeah. Are we visiting your family tomorrow?”  
  
“No, I don’t think they’re doing anything,” GOB responds, clearly trying to forget about the fact. “When I was last over there I heard something about a party, but when I asked about it, they said it was just a joke, and nothing was happening and not to worry about it. So, whatever, right?”  
  
Tony looks quizzically at GOB, and almost says something, but decides to hold his tongue. He has seen the way the other Bluths interact with GOB, and how they tend to exclude him from almost everything. Sometimes GOB seems to notice, and other times he doesn’t. Tony has learned though that it’s one of those things better left along. It’s better not to make GOB think about being excluded, because then he tends to get all woobly and cry a lot, and no one wins when that happens. This time GOB seems to legitimately think that nothing is going on, so Tony doesn’t even consider pushing the issue. “Yeah,” he says finally. “Whatever, right? Plus, now we have each other.” There’s a small silence as both men consider this thought, and finally Tony speaks again. “So, what did you do?”  
  
“Well,” GOB thinks for a moment. “I guess sometimes, when I was really small, we sat around the fire and talked about the year and stuff. That was nice.”  
  
Tony doesn’t see this as something the Bluth family would ever have done, although it’s something that GOB surely would have seen on television and in movies. But Tony nods and says, “Well, we don’t have a fire GOB, so we can’t do that. But… maybe…” And there, right on their television set is the delightful fire channel, that crackles and pops and lights up with pre-recorded flames. GOB and Tony sit down on the couch, and snuggle into each other, and there they can discuss the year, just like it seems GOB had imagined.  
  
“Remember when we went to Colour-Me-Mine? That was the best.” GOB exclaims.  
  
“Same! And when we did that joint magic show at the Gothic Castle?”  
  
“Yes! And when we stole a car and went on a wild ride?”  
  
“Wait. We stole that car?”  
  
GOB quickly changes the subject.“…. Remember when we tried to get revenge on each other and instead ending up with feelings for each other. What even was that?”  
  
Tony laughs. “I have feelings for you,” he responds, leaning in and planting a kiss protectively on GOB’s forehead. “Remember when you thought you weren’t gay?”  
  
“Well, who said I’m gay?” GOB protests.  
  
“Well, you like having normal sex with me, right?” Tony laughs.  
  
“Well, yes. But maybe I could like [bleep]ing women too? I don’t know. I heard there’s a word for that too.”  
  
Tony laughs again. “Well, then, remember when you didn’t think you would like [bleep]ing me?”  
  
“Well, you know, I definitely didn’t want to [bleep] you when I first met you… or read about you in POOF or anything… that definitely wasn’t a thing I thought about or anything….” GOB says uncomfortably, shrugging his shoulders in an attempt to disguise his true meaning. Tony chuckles and kisses him, and there, in front of their fake fire, on the Eve of what some may consider a holy day, they have some serious secular intercourse.  
  
\--  
  
As the two men lie in bed later that evening, GOB just can’t seem to sleep, and Tony can’t help but notice how restless he is.  
  
“You okay, Gobie?” he asks, concerned.  
  
“I’m just… I’m just happy I’m with you today, you know… actually, never mind.. I just…” GOB trails off, clearly struggling to find the words to explain what he wants to say, but Tony gets it.  
  
“Same. This Christmas should be nice. I’m glad to celebrate my first Christmas with you.”  
  
GOB smiles, and wraps his arms around Tony. “This is way better than Stripmas,” he says with a grin.  
  
Tony has a distinct idea as to what Stripmas would entail, and while he doesn’t particularly want to know the details, he secretly hopes that if GOB has a Stripper Santa outfit that he will bring it out in the morning. That would certainly make Christmas a day to remember.  
  
——  
  
The morning comes, and GOB practically drags an exhausted Tony out of bed and down the stairs at an obscenely early hour. “It’s Christmas!” he shouts, practically right into Tony’s ear. Tony is accustomed to GOB waking him up in a variety of ways, but most are more pleasurable than tugging on his arm and dragging him to the living room. Yet, when Tony gets there, he smiles. GOB has turned the lights on on the tree, and there are presents underneath, and there’s a smell of pancakes floating from the kitchen.  
  
“Tony open it! Open the gifts Tony! Open them all! Look at gifts, Tony!” GOB is clearly so excited, and Tony sees that there is no way that he will wait any longer, so he sits down by the tree. GOB hands him his first gift, and he is practically shaking with his excitement.  
  
Tony curls back the wrapping paper from the poorly wrapped gift in his hand, and feels that everything is sticky. As he opens it up, he realizes that it is a jar of mottled honey, with “GOB BEE COMPANY” scrawled on it in sharpie. It looks a little bit terrifying, and there is at least one dead bee within the jar, but with GOB beaming at him so enthusiastically, Tony can’t say anything bad about it.  
  
“This is some of the honey from your bees, isn’t it Gobie! That’s so awesome!”  
  
“Well, you know, I’m just a gentleman honey farmer,” GOB says with false modesty, but it is obvious that he is very proud of his achievement. He joyfully grabs another gift from the under the tree. “Here!” he exclaims. “This one is really special.”  
  
Tony opens this second gift carefully hoping that GOB hasn’t also gifted him some of the bees from his bee farm. However, he is thankfully not stung, and removes instead a card attached to a hard case. The card is quite interesting - it has a gigantic picture of Tony’s face, and the words, “You’re awesome!” Tony smiles, and looks up at GOB, he is practically vibrating in excitement.  
  
“Oh, this is nice….” Tony says to GOB, though slightly confused. “But, what exactly is it?”  
  
“Look behind the card!” GOB says enthusiastically, and Tony does just that. In his hand he is holding a jewel CD case, with a picture of GOB mugging wearing a suit and holding a puppet with rather bushy dark hair. It reads, “Franklin loves Tony”. While GOB’s name is not directly attached to the album cover, Tony knows that this is GOB’s way of saying he loves him too.  
  
“Put it in the CD player, Tony!” GOB says enthusiastically, practically grabbing the CD from Tony’s hands, as Tony stutters out a “but…who’s Franklin?”  
  
“This is where I’ve been going, Tony!” GOB says excitedly, not answering the question. “When I haven’t been here, this is what I’ve been doing! Isn’t it awesome? Aren’t I the best boyfriend ever?” GOB slips the CD into the player and stands with a big smile, staring right at Tony.  
  
As the music starts, Tony hears an adventure of songs, sung in a rather interesting fashion, all of them expressing affection for Tony. There’s even a Hannukah song which appears slightly racist, but Tony gives GOB points for trying his best. He smiles through the whole CD, even at those cringe-worthy moments. In fact, it’s all a little better, because GOB leaves and comes back with the puppet himself, introduces Tony to Franklin, and begins to sing along, and while it’s all a little weird, somehow it’s special, and it makes Tony smile.  
  
Underneath the present remains two gifts - both from Tony to GOB. One is just an envelope, but Tony hands the wrapped present to GOB with a smile. “Merry Christmas,” he says, looking first into GOB’s eyes, and then at the handiwork of his wrapping. Having never wrapped a present before, Tony had something searched 14 different wrapping tutorials, and after 7 attempts had wrapped the present so perfectly that it could have been done by a professional. As GOB rips the immaculate paper, Tony tries not to cringe, and focus instead on the look of happiness on GOB’s face as he digs through.  
  
“A new suit?” GOB asks with a grin, holding up the black jacket with purple pin-stripes.  
  
“Not quite,” Tony tells him. “It’s a new trick… I mean illusion jacket! I know you have trouble with lighter fluid and having the right thing in your jacket, so I thought that maybe a new jacket could help you organize your illusions even better! Also, I thought it would look handsome! Not that you don’t always look handsome.”  
  
GOB grins. “Yes,” he hisses happily. “This will be great for my illusions.” He gives Tony a hug, but Tony is already handing him the envelope.  
  
“Also,” Tony says, “Here!”  
  
GOB opens the envelope, reads for a moment, and then throws his arms around Tony. “A pet?!” he says excitedly. “We should get a rabbit or a dog or a cat or a dove! Ooh can we get a dove. That would be perfect.”  
  
“Of course,” Tony says. “Whatever you want, but it’s going to be our pet, and we’re going to care for it together. And you’re not going to kill it.”  
  
“And, I’m not going to kill it”, repeats GOB happily, letting happy tears fall from his face and against Tony’s. “I’m not going to kill it.”  
  
“Merry Christmas GOB. This holiday is alright, mainly cause I get to spend it with you.”  
  
“Merry Christmas Tony.”  
  
——  
  
The men take so long to make it to the kitchen that the pancakes are very cold, possibly because they had trouble keeping their hands off each other in the meantime. As they happily eat their breakfast together, there is suddenly a noise in the driveway, and GOB stands up, startled.  
  
“I’ll….be right back…” he says, and runs out the door.  
  
Tony stays sitting for a moment, quite confused and concerned, but then gets up to check what’s going on. As he steps out of the door, he sighs.  
  
“GOB, you’ve got to be kidding me.”  
  
There sitting in the driveway, and also halfway blocking half the road, is a giant yacht.  
  
GOB pokes his head out from the yacht, and he is wearing a Santa hat.  “One second, Tony,” he says with a smile. “I’m almost ready.”  
  
Tony stands, arms folded, until a very cold looking GOB pops out from the yacht. He is wearing a stripper Santa outfit, and Tony finds himself laughing, laughing and laughing. “GOB, you are…. You are really something. Also, you do realize that people can see you, right?”  
  
“What’s the point of being a stripper if people can’t see you?” GOB asks, with a cheeky smile. “Merry Stripmas, Tony.”  
  
Tony is still staring at the yacht, even though GOB is beckoning him to come closer.  
  
“Don’t worry. It’s a rental.”  
  
“The suit or the yacht?”  
  
“The su—… the yacht. Definitely the yacht.”  
  
It’s Christmas. Tony can worry about exactly how much of an idiot GOB is being later. Shaking his head in fond disbelief, he follows GOB onto the boat, ready for a ride of his life without even leaving the driveway.  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope that these delightful fools have satisfied you and made you smile and laugh and filled you with Holiday cheer :) I know that you may not actually celebrate Christmas, but seeing as the Bluths do, perhaps you can enjoy Tony's bewilderment and general disdain for the idea, but acceptance of his partner's ideas will sit well with you! 
> 
> Also, this is not what I planned to write for you. I planned to write your LGTP prompt and still plan to do so in the near future but I got silly and procrastinate-y so it didn't happen. But... it is coming. It is definitely coming. :) 
> 
> I hope the bus enjoys this too, and that the Tony POV is satisfactory for you!!


End file.
